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Les relations: une position que nous prenons pour quelqu’un d’autre

Les relations: une position que nous prenons pour quelqu’un d’autre

Landmark Forum Leader Insights : Les relations : une position que nous prenons pour quelqu’un d’autre

Par Nancy Zapolski, PhD

L’amour profond rendu possible dans nos relations nous vient d’un profond sentiment d’alignement : un alignement de nos visions, de nos intentions et des objectifs les plus fondamentaux de nos vies, dans lequel chaque personne sait qu’il y a un espace pour que l’autre puisse exister, grandir et s’épanouir. Les relations sont un acte créatif, un engagement qui vit dans l’action : une position que nous prenons pour quelqu’un.

Lorsque des doutes, des considérations ou des désaccords ont lieu, ils ne sont pas en opposition, ou contraire à cette position, mais ce sont une invitation à danser avec ce qui se trouve devant nous. Ce n’est pas le contenu (les circonstances ou « ce qui est arrivé ») de nos relations qui détermine leur qualité et leur force ou les empêche d’être exceptionnelles. C’est la façon dont nous « retenons » ce contenu. Si, toutefois, nous ne faisons que nous plaindre (de ce qui manque dans notre relation ou ce qui existe mais que nous ne voulons pas) comme si le fait de ne pas être satisfait était notre position, il est utile de reconnaître ceci à propos de nous-mêmes. Quelle est la force des actions de quelqu’un lorsque ces actions sont le produit d’une plainte ? Promettre de fournir ce qui manque nous fait prendre des risques alors qu’en nous plaignant nous ne prenons aucun risque. C’est en prenant des risques que nous nous révélons les uns aux autres, que nous devenons nous-mêmes.

Il n’y a rien qui limite les possibilités de nos relations, il y a seulement des conversations qui limitent ou des conversations qui créent des possibilités. Nous choisissons ce qui est en jeu. Les relations sont quelque chose que nous avançons comme une déclaration, une position que nous prenons pour quelqu’un d’autre.

Nancy Zapolski
Landmark Forum leader

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